Happy Roanoke

First, let it be known that after only one day on the trip we are sure of two things: 1) This was an excellent idea. 2) Deodorant is not mere suggestion. We're parked in the lot that will serve as our campground tonight, stealing Wifi from a Subway shop and taking a well deserved break. Today, though relaxing, was very busy. We drove from Rhode Island to Roanoke in under 10 hours, showered, picked up some provisions, posted a blog, and met up with locals all before noon. Much to our delight, showering at Planet Fitness has proven itself to be a brilliant aspect of our plan. Not only are we technically not doing anything wrong, but the gym employees are far too welcoming and obliging to ask how it is we managed to work out, shower, and change in 30 minutes or less. I'm sure they find it suspicious that we left smiling having never touched a treadmill. We are kind of banking on their hospitality getting in the way of their curiosity, and since we will only use each location once or twice, we don't expect to run into any trouble. For what it's worth, we are pleased with the friendliness and cleanliness of the environment. Indeed, we feel no judgement from the establishment or its inhabitants. Let's hope it stays that way because the more we describe to people what we're doing, the more we realize how much we sound like gypsies or hippies or just plain idiots. Since we are none of those things, we are hoping that they just won't ask so we won't tell. 

Our first little hiccup (besides the great cream flood of Pennsylvania), of course, involved Pete. I forgot to pack him a belt, or rather I made the mistake of thinking he would remember one. But, what he lacks in memory he makes up for in creativity. When I came fresh out of PF post-shower, I found Pete in the parking lot, sporting a makeshift belt he devised out of a dog leash be bought at the Dollar Store. No, I'm not kidding, and yes, it held up. He was very proud of himself and has been sporting the thing all day over a pair of sharply clashing plaid shorts. What's not to love?

Cousin love never gets old 

Meet Annie and Bonnie 

Meeting up with my cousins was the perfect way to kick off this trip. Not only are they sickeningly adorable, but they have a fine-tuned tolerance for my antics and have been nothing but supportive about this entire endeavor. True, they may have held back a few critical comments when they laid eyes on Carla, but in the end I think they get what we're doing and why. We are related, after all, so this craziness runs in the blood. We may not look alike, but we share a common gene pool for silliness. You can see it in the photos... 

We watched their track practice (they're state champs) and then went out for BBQ with them and the adoring gentleman caller. Joey, Annie's boyfriend, was lucky enough to spend the morning with Pete and I as well. We picked him up from his AP test just after noon. Apparently, teens in Roanoke aren't required to attend their classes because he kept putting off his inevitable return to school. We were all too willing to oblige, and found ourselves touring a local flea market. "Happy's," a completely ironically named disaster of a death trap, lies randomly on the side of an otherwise socially acceptable Roanoke street. We entered with caution and were immediately overcome by the strong stench of unwanted kitsch. Simply put, the place just smelled old. Whether it was mold or rot that caused the smell, it could not possibly distract us from the eyesore that lay within. A redneck Chinatown, Happy's was a prison where enthusiastic vendors and hygiene goes to die. Rows and rows of second and third hand shops filled the halls, presenting nothing of true value that wouldn't break after purchase or turn your fingers green. Broken appliances, grimy homemade clothes, rejected toys, and intentionally forgotten relics were scattered about the store in no apparent order. 

Vendors seemed too lazy or too stoned to care whether or not we purchased anything and I couldn't help but wonder how any of them stay in business. In a seemingly unending maze, Happy's funneled us through the stores and towards a back hall that was in desperate need of repair. We encountered a particularly toothless and tattooed gentleman who explained why the ceiling of the market appeared to be peeing a brown, liquid garbage through a tube that lead to a dump bucket. He told us that there was a leak and they were draining it. We noticed several other "leaks" in the ceiling that had been plastered over with tape and Rubbermaid bins. We exited the building as quickly as possible. 

Not that it wasn't fun to visit Happy's, we did enjoy the outdoor vendors and looking at the little treasures they had to offer, but to be honest it was all just kind of gross. Still, it was an experience and not one we're soon to forget. 

Being in Roanoke has been easy to enjoy. We took a cat nap in the back of Carla while waiting for my cousins to get out of school. It was a scorching 90 degrees and sunny, but a lovely breeze swept through every now and again to make us appreciate just how beautiful the valleys are. We really could not have asked for a nicer day, and apparently it's the best weather they've had this season. The gratuitous number of churches has taken us by surprise. There is one of every corner and that's not something us New Englanders are used to. There is also a lot of religious radio programming and we've been hard pressed to find a station that isn't airing Rush Limbaugh at least 4 hours a day. We've found a country folk station that we really enjoy and we can't help but notice that everybody down here moves just a little slower and reacts with an extra spoonful of kindness. 

Cee Cee of Pawtucket, RI

At Kroger, the local "Stop and Shop," we discovered that our cashier was actually a Rhode Island native. Originally of Pawtucket, Cee Cee explained that she moved to Roanoke with her brother to live on his property. She admitted that she liked the people better in the south, but that she missed the ocean. I know the feeling, I'm already feeling a little claustrophobic myself. I will feel better once we are closer to the coast again. It was great running into a Rhode Islander, especially in such an unlikely capacity. Cee Cee had wonderful things to say about the Ocean State and vows to return soon. 

Ridiculous and awesome

We finished off the day with dinner in front of the Red Sox game, a rare treat in these parts. My cousins expressed frustration at not being able to view Boston games on local channels, but the baseball gods were smiling this evening because we were able to get together and watch a win. It was the perfect ending to a great day. If this is any indication of how this trip is going to go, I think we're in good shape. Pete's allergies are acting up, but I'm hoping they'll clear up as we continue south. Now, we're going to go shower again. This super day has made us super gross. Hopefully, the Planet Fitness employees have done a shift change, otherwise we are about to have an awkward interaction trying to get into the gym... Next, sleep, breakfast, and heading to Nashville around 6 a.m. 

Joey, Annie, Pete, Liz, Bonnie 

I could get used to this... 

First Drive, Still Alive

It’s official! We’re on our way!!!

After napping from 8 to 11 p.m., we bid farewell to our house and roommates in the dark. We left Narragansett, Rhode Island at midnight, nervous and excited and strung out on anticipation. Apparently the anticipation wasn’t enough to keep him awake, because Pete downed a Monster energy drink right away. But, seeing he drinks his bodyweight in coffee each day thus rendering him immune to caffeine, he dosed off soon after we left the Ocean State. My WPRO internship required a 3AM wake up call for the past 5 months, so crack-of-dawn driving is old news for me and I volunteered for the first shift. We made excellent time, clearing the dreaded George Washington Bridge just around 3:30 a.m. My lead foot paid off and we sailed easily through those risky patches where traffic could go on for days.  With Late Night “UFO” radio to keep me company, I cruised through Connecticut, New York, and Pennsylvania before sunrise. It’s very peaceful, driving on a wide open and dimly lit highway while listening to radio whack jobs declare their devout belief in Sasquatch.  “Coast to Coast” entertained me until about 4 a.m., until I began to get creeped out  and a little drowsy by the deserted highway. Unlike Pete, I don’t drink coffee or battery acid so I woke him to keep me alert and protect me from Sasquatch of the south. 

Just before dawn, we pulled over to a Sheetz in Carlisle, PA to stretch, fuel, and switch. Aside from the fact of it being named “Sheetz,” the stop had everything we needed. There was even a rather large convenient store there, and we found ourselves among only weary truckers.  I went to the ladies’ room and left Pete to his own devices, only to find that in that time he managed to make a mess. I’m not sure what he thought would happen when he pushed the “cream” button on their coffee machine, but the phrase “Oh sheetz” certainly came to mind as I watched him hastily mop cream off the store counter. We left immediately.

So far, we are getting about 32.7 mpg and averaging 66.7 miles per hour because we're awesome. We didn't even use 2 full tanks of gas and the spare tire didn't slide off the roof! This is all making Pete very happy. I'm just relieved that Carla is making it out of New England...

I'm pretty sure my uncle is placing bets that we won't make it. He doesn't believe in Carla like we do!  

On an unrelated note, she's burning oil like it's going out of style and so according to Pete's calculations, we are going have to buy 3.5 gallons of it to get her to Washington. But, I digress. 

The sunrise was beautiful over the hills of Pennsylvania and West Virginia, and we crossed the Virginia line just before 7 a.m. My cousins have been texting me about their plans for the day, and we can't wait to catch up with them later this afternoon.

As the sun rose over the farms and fields, we were cruising down 81 S, listening to a gospel morning show. When in Rome… 

Next: Cousins and our Virginia adventures! 

This is awesome already!